Stick it to the man

Whenever I am discussing my condition or body in general, I see the body and oneself as two separate things that need to work together. They need to be a team to function properly and perform. I felt that with this issue, my body is fighting against me and that is often a difficult thing to contend with. The issue is particularly enlightened when mentioning ones manhood. You need to be a team more than ever, whatever the context and when all this started happening it was a confusing time. It felt like my body had shut down, unwilling to cooperate for the simplest of things like going for a wee! However in the early stages, when I realised I would have to permanently self catheterise, I was told I could meet a urology nurse who would be able to show me how to use these new mythical objects to regain a little bit more control and have an understanding of this new way of life. It was massively reassuring so I headed to the hospital with a slight sense of trepidation.   Agai...

I recently contacted a charitable organisation, to tell my story. They seemed quite interested but as we tried to organise a conversation nothing came of it and yet again I have reached that point, as I have many times in the last few years, how do I talk about the fact I cannot wee? That one day I went to the toilet and nothing happened and 5 years later it still hasn’t. I have often asked myself is there any real need to tell it? I have decided there is. Men don’t talk enough about problems, we keep it quite and try to match up to certain traits of masculinity when the expectations of what a man is, are ever changing. We have weaknesses and flaws. Our insecurities often come down to image and perhaps performance. So what happens when a twenty-two year old has a seismic change with his manhood? It was the summer of 2012 and I was back in London for the summer after a turbulent final year at university. I had overcome the usual hurdles of dissertation deadlines and the small m...